I'm not stuck. I'm just.. crawling... backwards. At least I'm moving.. I notice the back of my head start to tense up. This has been my life... churning thought into stress and then into physical trauma. Trauma is such a graphic word. Open mouths displaying teeth, arms desparately reaching and searching, whips and chains, a torn and worn out stretcher, perhaps a cot with a devious alterior purpose... Trauma. Trauma and drama. Maladies.. Tumors... Sickness.. Dying... black cancer... herpes... A.I.D.S... stupid stuff.
All incredibly black thoughts, if you ask me. Black thoughts and fears. These are my modern day fears. Bleh.
So, how do I overcome these fears? Certainly these are not enemies I wish to someday face, at least not personally. Though, I do think it would be amazing to be a part of the team that discovers how to prevent these things. Much more than prevent, dissolve completely. The purpose of disease is to be overcome, thus propelling the once afflicted person into bliss again. Because we are all blissful, should we allow ourselves to be. It is really that simple. Just be happy. Take your own advice. Discover your personal comfort zone and break it over your head. Build a new one. This is a part of the essential alchemy of day to day human happiness. It helps to be adaptive, asertive, precise, certain, sound, and curious.
At least, this is my nature... I can stand back and say "Wow!" to give myself encouragement whenever I need it... and I always need it.
So, this chapter of my life takes me from "Aw" to "Wow."
I'm drenched in excitement.