Tuesday, December 22, 2009

New Traditions

Swallowed oxegen and I'm feeling fair. It's 8:02am, which means my alarm clock is going to sound off in 28 minutes. That is however, unless I stop it from doing so, which I plan to. Laura is asleep next to me. I've been awake for 3 maybe 4 hours now. Laura spent half an hour awake with me and then fell back into dreams. I'm trying to figure out if the spell check works on this thing. It doesn't seem to.

Anyway... It's Tuesday. Today, I have scheduled to get together with good Ol' Sam Schwartz. I know, I didn't see that coming either. We are supposed to rendevouz around 11am however, I do not have an economic means for transportation.. Therefor, I think I'll call him and have him over here. But first, (Butt First?) I have to clean up. Laura and I tend to get messy,

Sadly, these days I cannot use the phrase "Another Day, Another Dollar." Because I am still unemployed.

I was once Funemployed, which is when one is unemployed but having a good time. But, the fun has become undone. Not to say that I'm not enjoying this quality time but, I need money.

It seems to be a time of new traditions, where one cycle of familiarity ends and another begins. The other night, at Laura's birthday dinner with her family, I couldn't help but to think about the night Omar and I spent hanging out with Barry. For Laura's Birthday, we had planned to go to Chili's in Walnut Creek because it's her annual tradition. December, birthday, family dinner, Chili's. Very simple and direct. But the Chili's in Walnut Creek has closed down. For lease. Gone. Total bummer. So instead, we drove to the Chili's in Concord. I felt too quiet at the table. I just didn't want to interupt the dialogue, where ever it was. I like to observe and listen. I like to take time to relfect. I thought about Chevy's. Sitting with Barry and Omar. A totally lame scenario. Barry didn't know that many people it seemed but, when he needed help moving it seemed like he knew no one. Because no one was helping him. So Omar and I decided to. And when we finished, we thought we'd show this generous and lonley older man a good time. So, we came over after work, had some tequila, smoked some weed, and then went to Chevy's. Maybe it was because I was high. Maybe it's because I was giving up depression. Maybe it's because I was crazy. Or maybe, this is was the most depressing thing I had been apart of. Barry's situation made me think of my situation. And I don't want to end up like Barry. 50 something. Overweight. Divorced. But, it wasn't like the guy was a loser. He is a decently financially stable person. He seems very smart. I think I saw some impressive degree's while helping him pack. He wasn't going to be alone for long. He was moving to New Orleans to be with his girlfriend. He met her on a business trip. He drove over 2000 miles to find happiness and to be with his new love. So, maybe Barry had the right idea after all. Though it was strange that he asked me if I had any porn I could share with him on multiple occasions. So here I am with Laura and her family and we're having a great time at Chili's. Laura wants steak. My goodness she wants steak. I love Chili's but, i never know what to order. Everything sounds and looks so good! I usually order something close to the cheapest thing on the menu when I went out with girlfriends families. And up until recently I didn't know why. Actually, the reason why is a bit depressing. But, I digress. Tonight I thought, why not be a bit extravagant tonight and try something new? It looks good on the menu, and it certainly sounds appetizing. So I did. I ordered the Fajita Trio. Steak, chicken, and shrimp with grilled onions and bell peppers served with pico de gallo, guacamole, sour cream, and flour tortillas. Cadillac Style(Which means, for an extra ninety-nine cents you can get rice and black beans). And it was fablous. It felt good to choose something I really wanted. It felt good to be next to Laura on her birthday. It felt like something unfamiliar but, nothing strange. Like realizing how something on your body works. It just works. Take care of it, and hopefully it works for the rest of your life. Don't take care of it and you'll end up hurting in regret. I've learned many lessons. And from these lessons I've been taught many things. One thing I'll never forget; regret. I dont want to regret anything.

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